Heart of Innocence and Oswald's Dirk

Difficulty:  Must have 200+ Health, 150+ to solo
Level Restriction:  None for Oswald's Dirk, 60+ For Heart of Innocence 
Timer:  None for Oswald's Dirk, 30 Days for everything else
Can be Solo'd?  Yes, with lockpick
Rewards:  Oswald's Dirk (optional), Heart of Innocence, Jaleh's Necklace, Jaleh's Chain Shirt, Jaleh's Leggings, 2M XP

Jaleh al-Thani, the founder of Ayan Baqar, has gone missing.  His wife suspects foul play and would like you to investigate his disappearance.  You won't like what you uncover...

Step 1:  Investigation.  Your first stop is Ayan Baqar, the scene of the crime.  Getting to Ayan is a pain unless you live there.  If you have to run, make sure you buff appropriately.  Find Jaleh's wife Aaminah at 60.0S, 87.8W and greet her.  Now go to the top of the roof behind her and pick up 4 clues:  Strands of Silk, a Half-Empty Cider, an Empty Mug, and Sweet-smelling Bark. 

Step 1a:  The Silk.  If you inspect the Strands, you will notice that they belong to the tailor in Sawato.  Head to Sawato and find Ro Bi-Jor at 28.5S, 59.2E.  Give Ro the silk and she will claim she has nothing to do with the disappearance.  As she suggests, pick up her sollerets, which spawn right next to her.  They contradict her claims!  Give them to her and she will claim she's being framed. 

Step 1b:  The Cider.  Head to Yaraq, home of the famous Yaraq Apple Orchards.  Head to 22.4S, 1.9W and show Lubziklan al-Luq the Half-Empty Cider.  He will direct you to Ulgrim the Unpleasant, the notorios drunkard.  You have a couple choices now - you can either find the real Ulgrim (who moves around from time to time) or you can go to Ulgrim's Island and talk to the Fake Ulgrim living there - both options work, but since Fake Ulgrim is always in one place, I'll assume you're going that way.  Head to Nanto and buy some Winter Lager from the Barkeep in town.  Now head to Baishi and head to the Drunken Madman located at 53.0S, 61.0E.  Give him the Winter Lager and he will summon a portal to Ulgrim's Island.  Give Ulgrim the Half-Empty Cider and he'll deny involvement!  While you're here, give him the Empty Mug and he will tell you that it belongs to Celcynd the Dour.

Step 1c:  The Mug.  Head to Rithwic and find Celcynd in the Royal Firkin Pub in the west end of town.  Give him his Empty Mug back and he will ask to see the Bark you are carrying.  Give it to him and he will tell you it comes from the Tiofor Wood north of Glendon Wood. 

Step 1d:  The Puzzle.  Follow Celcynd's advice and head for Glendon Wood and run to 32.1N, 25.6E.  You will find a Wooden Tablet on the ground here.  Pick it up and read it - it's a puzzle!  Decipher it if you like.  It tells you to head to the Beach Fort and head 4 degrees north and 3 east of the Fort and look for a gateway.

Step 2:  Oswald's Hideout.  Take the Lady Maila Estates settlement out of Mayoi and head to 80.0N, 45.6W, where you will find a Fir Tree.  Use it and you will enter Oswald's hideout!  Entering Oswald's Hideout flags you to continue the quest and it isn't necessary (or possible if you don't have lockpick) to finish this part of the quest.  If you don't want Oswald's Dirk or don't have Lockpick, recall out.  If you do want to proceed, take the portal in the entry room to the Lockpick testing room.  Buff your health and lockpick as high as it goes and then use the box.  If you succeed, you will be teleported into the next trial.  If you fail, you will take several Heart Rends, possibly enough to kill you!  Heal again and try again.  The next room is a nightmare - it's filled with many floating platforms above Rolling Balls of Death!  Check the map of the Hideout to see which platforms you should jump to.  Alternately, you can run on the ground and avoid the balls.  Either way, this is a very difficult section and if you die, you won't be able to recover.  The portal to the next section is on the far side of the room and leads to the next trial.  The next room has several bows that will shoot you with arrows the entire time.  To pass this trial, you need to land a critical hit on the target on the far side of the room.  Use a missile weapon, war magic, or lifebolts to attack.  Once you land a critical, you will be teleported into the final trial, a riddle room.  Talk to the Babysitter Idol inside receive 4 colored balls and he will tell you the riddle.  Your job is to decide which ball goes to which Tusker Shrine.  Figure it out yourself or give Po Po the Yellow, Shim Shim the Red, Mu Mu the Green, and Cao Cao the Blue ball.  When you are done, greet the Judgement Statue and you will receive Oswald's Key and be teleported into the reward room.  Use Oswald's Key on Oswald's Chest to get your Dirk.  There are 3 other chests - 2 pickable and a SIK chest.  You may also try picking Oswald's Chest again if you want another Dirk (but I can't imagine why you would want to do that).

Step 3:  Heart of Innocence.  All that preparation has flagged you to enter this dungeon.  It is very difficult and dangerous - there are VII vuln and war traps all over the place, in addition to all the Bandit humans.  You can die in a heartbeat if you aren't careful.  I'd strongly suggest gathering a group, bringing many dispel gems, and having at least 250 health before trying this dungeon.  You'll also need a lockpicker.  Gather your group and head to 34N 39E or thereabouts - the dungeon is actually somewhat random.  Head into the dungeon and buff up.  You will need all protects and banes.  Pick your favorite weapon, as these Humans are equally resistant to all sorts of damage.  When you are done, move toward the locked door.  Open it and carefully step forward.  There is a trap here, but you will need to set it off because there is a key on the ground here.  Everyone in the group needs to pick it up.  When everyone has their key, slowly and cautiously move forward, healing as you take damage, until you reach the first group of Humans in a large room.  The room has no traps fortunately.  Pick the lock on the far side and another just past that door and you will enter more trapped corridor.  Carefully make your way up one of the ramps (they both lead to the same place) and you will come to an entrance to a large room.  Be very careful - there are several traps right around the entrance here and you could easily take 2 wars if you go too fast.  Make your way to the far end of the room and head down the ramp into another trapped corridor.  Keep going and you will soon reach the 5 named Bandits in charge of the dungeon.  These guys are very dangerous - engage them at maximum range and watch their war magic.  Don't charge them or you will most likely die from traps.  Once they are dead, check out the room where they spawned.  There are two items you need here - Jaleh's Silk Shirt and Jaleh's Necklace.  When everyone has both, press on to the east - you can be a bit faster now, as there are no more traps.  The east corridor will lead to a locked door - pick it and you will enter a small square room.  Pick up Jaleh's Turban on the floor here.  Instead of taking the obvious exit, head to the E wall and pass through the false wall there.  Carefully follow the corridor and you will reach another false wall, leading to Jaleh's Body.  Kill the Humans here first and then start picking up Jaleh's Items - a Wedding Ring and Slippers.  Also use Jaleh's Body to receive the Heart of the Innocent.  When everyone has their items here, head up the ramp just to the south of Jaleh's corpse and make your way to the southeast.  Here you will find a chest.  Line up and use the key you found at the entrance on it to recover Jaleh's Armor.  When everyone has their armor, recall out.

Step 4:  Rewards.  Return to Ayan and give Jaleh's Widow all the items except the Armor, Necklace, and the Heart.  She will reward you with XP for all but the Silk Shirt, for which she will give you a note.  That note is giveable and is worth 500,000 XP and goes to Ro Bi-Jor in Sawato.  The Necklace is quite useful for anyone who needs extra health.  The Armor really isn't that useful and is gathering dust on my mules.  The Heart is what makes this quest worth doing.  It can be added to Perfect Isparian Weapons to add new spells and (more importantly) a Human Slayer property to the weapon.  The Weeping Wand is standard issue for PK and PKL mages.  The Missile and Melee weapons aren't as useful, given that their damages are lower than the high end AR weapons available, but are still somewhat useful.

Step 5:  Optional Melee Addition.  Melees may add elemental damage to their Weeping Weapons.  The change is permanent, so choose wisely.  To start, bring an MMD note to Hemmik the Sly at 34.0N, 39.7E.  He will flag you to enter the Elemental Caverns, where you can charge your Weeping Weapon.  Buff up - you'll be fighting Gromnies, so buff a physical weapon and protect and bane against pretty much everything.  Now head to 82.6S 47.5W, which is just west of the Southern Landbridge.  It's a long run from practically anywhere unfortunately.  When you arrive, you will find 4 paths leading down - one for each element.  Head NE for Lightning, SE for Fire, SW for Acid, and NW for Frost.  Each path is filled with Gromnies, but you will only be fighting one elemental type in each section.  The paths aren't identical, but they are similar.  You'll make your way down to a large open room with a path leading down in the middle.  Then you'll jump down into the bottom floor.  The final room has many gromnies, an exit portal, and an elemental pool.  Give your Weeping Weapon to the pool to charge it.  The pool only changes the damage type, not any of the other stats.  Here's the Electric Axe!